Stupid Human Tricks
For this weeks stupid human tricks, I performed tasks all day long. And none of them were what I would have liked to have been doing. And most were long overdue.
Do ordinary households have conversations such as these?
Him: Hi. How are you?
Me: Good. Relatively, unproductive. No, not really, spent all day trying to stay out of jail. Not jail actually, but you know, the bureaucratic bullshit that haunts grown-ups who made asses of themselves in their twenties so we would not be asses now. But now, oh shit, is there a warrant for my arrest in New Jersey!?
You?
Him: Err, still sick. Tired.
I’m going to change my clothes now.
Poor guy. He can’t even blame marrying me on his youth.
DD got an extra stamp for being the best following-instructions ballerina. She’s delighted.
SS’s girlfriend re-appeared.
I have strong feelings of I relate to that, when watching Californication. Not the fabulous body, getting laid all the time, and making tons of money part of course. The somehow I manage to leave a trail of destruction behind to bite me in the ass later part.
In all fairness, I have not really gotten into much trouble for the past ten years. It’s the trouble before that, things like forgotten out of state traffic tickets that crop up and ruin my well mannered days. And really, it’s not like I did something violent.
The stupid human tricks I usually do are things like dealing with an expired drivers license, and suspension, and trying to plan a trip and buying airfare, and getting a new phone all in the same week. And adding a bunch of plugins to the blog; and agreeing to write two more articles in two different languages. Like any one of those things all by itself would not have my task list struggling for air.
And now, Friday, and have tons of stuff to do. And DH will be golfing on Sunday. Ugh.
I was going to declare it a victory, or at least a draw if I could manage to pick up DD on time and cook dinner. I got her on time, but have ten pounds of half thawed chicken in the sink. If I had done what I intended and separated it into one pound batches and frozen it separately I would not have this mess. Such was the start of my week, setting it in the freezer and forgetting.
I didn’t get the mail out in time and am now greeted by legal notices for my grandmothers estate. More things in there for me to do, I’m sure.
I declare it the weekend and everything ignorable except the article I owe Tryhandmade. Anyway, I’ve already done the research and like writing that piece. It’s the optimist in me. I fantasize about saving an eczema sufferer from certain outbreak doom or maybe a tree.
